Hospital visit.

I have an appointment to see my oncologist on Thursday afternoon. I only have to go once a year now but each time I dread the visit. I have been very lucky, and up to now I have come out with a clean bill of health though you never know, she may find something I have missed, hence why I dread it I suppose! I check myself regularly for lumps and bumps, not that I have found any, apart from the reactive lymph nodes in my neck which I have been told are no problem, though they have yet to disappear. As my GP said to me one day when I asked about them, if they were any problem they would be the size of an orange by now! He has a point I suppose! I was given a 10 year time period to keep seeing the oncologist and surgeon, a lot of breast cancer patients only have to go for 5 years but mine was fast growing and aggressive, hence the increased time. I have now been going for 7 years and though I don`t like going, and dread every visit, I can imagine that when we reach that 10 year point when I no longer need to attend hospital on a regular basis, I may well feel apprehensive and worried, because my safety net will be taken from me. I know I felt the same when my chemotherapy sessions finished, although I was very glad to not have chemo any longer, I was apprehensive that I had no reassurance that things were okay every couple of weeks or so. They were brilliant, and understood the way I would feel, reassuring me that they were just on the end of the phone, if I needed any help or someone to talk to.  They told me a lot of people feel the same way. The number is still underneath a fridge magnet on my fridge door.